Make It Strong August 17, 2019

A conversation with a fellow bartender at Finn's Corner the other day about things customers say that piss you off reminds me of this photo. He mentioned that he has a certain demographic at his bar that likes to demand things be "made strong." That brings me back to a story from a number of years ago where someone ordered a fellow bartender for a "Long Island.. Make it Strong."

Now for those of you who don't know, Long Island Iced Teas (LITE) aka Long Islands is 97% booze with the exception of the sour mix and diet coke. So for someone to ask for it strong is either unfamiliar with the drink or just a jerk. Either way, here goes the story:

A guy comes into the bar and a fellow co-worker was working behind the bar. The guy asks for: "Gimme a Long Island son, make it strong" Now I can't say if my co-worker was having a bad day but he wasn't feeling the "Make it strong" request. He counters with: "Okay, you want it strong? How about you lean over the bar and I'll just pour it down your throat."

I've been to bars where people walk the bar and pour you shots as if you were a baby bird being fed by mama bird. This place wasn't one of those places and the guy declined the offer and just left. Moral of the story: don't order a Long Island and ask for it to be made strong. It's redundant. Which leads me to the second image.

Now I'm not one to call out a customer for not tipping. I firmly believe that if you get shafted on one tip, a later more profitable tip will balance that one out. Karma and all that jazz. So this guy comes in and orders a Henny and Cran. I make it as I normally do. Now keep in mind, I don't over pour but I have a heavier pour than others. Between 1.5oz and 2oz. He takes a sip and says "Yo this has too much cran." I respond "That's a standard pour, if you want more Henny, I can pour you a double but you have to pay for a double." Lo and behold my mahogany was left naked*** aka no tip. (*** Dressing the mahogany is an old school term for leaving a tip on the bar that was introduced to me by Gus the Drunk at the Bleecker Street Bar "Hey Partna Over There" RIP Gus)

The same happened on the next round where his lady ordered two of the same drinks and two shots of Henny. No tip. A couple of the regulars were like "That's fucked up. No tip?" I just shrugged. It is what it is. Why complain about what you can't control. Right? I rang in $60 for the bar which is $60 more than if they hadn't come in.

So this is a query for you fellow barkeeps out there. What requests from customers (if any) tick you off. Enquiring minds want to know!!!

Until Then Happy Drinking:
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